re-education (through labor)

yesterday i stared at the tv so long, everything started swaying. i thought it was the tv producing swaying images, then i stared at a wall portrait and that was swirling too, like a mirage. i saw many brilliant goals yesterday, torres slotting the ball into the only spot which would have resulted in a goal. dossena's goal out of nowhere and arshavin's mercurial solo effort. all i wish now is for arsenal to get 4th spot. man utd would probably win the league.

i wish i had my own laptop, which supports crysis at max graphics, then everyday will be a bright one and my life will not be dull.

if only someone would command me, then life could be purposeful. i'm definitely not ready to take charge of my life man. being in school, bmt, where schedules are followed, i follow and i feel good when the day ends and i've learnt new things, had good conversations. when i'm out and on my own, i'm a wandering nomad. roaming the explored lands of my home seeking the same purposeful experiences and all i find is the computer and its many wonders.

someone save me please. maybe i should pick up my rusty guitar again, the one hidden in the closet, probably grey now. i have no idea whether my amp still works. and blogging has become rather dull, and expressing my emotions has turned chore-ish. anyway some opinions and emotions, actually most opinions i'd rather not and don't say. because i'd prefer not to offend people. i'm wondering now, is there anyone out there who thinks and acts like me, cos many times i think i've found the one, but i always get it wrong.

i try to be able to talk to everyone, which has proven to be rather smooth running in tekong. i won't say its being people pleasing, just that i'd rather be flexible and not stick to cliques. and i can speak in different wavelengths, throw me chinese and i'll give you conversational chinese, throw me swear words and i'll throw ten back haha. just don't get on my nerves, cos when i hate people, nice person mode off. i can be very cunning and manipulative if i have the motivation to.

right now, i feel the best option for me is to upgrade myself. i need a physical upgrade, and um give me a hair growth upgrade. plus that girlfriend attachment, that will boost my hp and mp regeneration. i wonder what's gotten into me. anyway, posting is next friday i think, i do hope i get into ocs.